Two years ago we finally released the dream that had been resting in my heart since 2015. And when I say “we” I mean that I decided to take that leap of faith and start a project that welcomed the internet world into my life of living with a chronic illness. I decided to let you see what goes on inside my head and my heart as I continue to play out the “new normal” after my mom’s death. These losses, these examples of grief, are no small occurrences and I knew that once I made the choice to talk about them, there would be no chance of turning back.
And I’d have it no other way!
I’d love to continue to pen a heartfelt book of my emotions here but I’d be here all day.
So instead, here are my Top 7 (on the 7th duh) memorable Big Girl Panties moments thus far:
#1 | Crying At My Own Shoot
When I created my first videos for Big Girl Panties I wanted to share ‘My Story’ about my mom’s passing and being diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. I had the lovely Lara Smith of LDS Multimedia filming, and I asked a new friend, Olivia Hamilton, to conduct the interview because she hadn’t been in my life for those 2 events and I knew she’d remain impartial. I wanted to share my ‘MS Story’ first and then finish things off talking about my ‘Losing Mom Story’. So when we started filming and the first question prompted to me was “Tell me about what happened with your mom”, I was completely thrown off guard and the water works quickly ensued! I had never retold that story with so much detail before, let alone do it on camera for the world to see. I didn’t expect to cry the way that I did but this journey has taught me that it doesn’t matter how many years go by, this girl will always be able to get emotional when talking about her mommy. And that is okay! It just shows her impact in my life.
#2 | Pitching my blog at BlogHer18
I launched Big Girl Panties on August 7th because I went to the BlogHer18 blogging conference in New York City to learn some tips and network with others. And in order to do that I wanted people to have something to view after I gave them my fancy business card. All of that sounds great in theory, but actually having to introduce myself to strangers and quickly tell them about this new blog sharing my grief, is a little crazy. At that point I thought to myself, “Why didn’t I create a blog about fashion or recipes instead?! People like those!”. No but truthfully, going to this conference taught me that you should always be confident in your thing! I met some pretty great women at the conference who I still follow today 🙂 It was a little nerve wracking, but women really do network quickly – whether it’s in the bathroom during a night out or at a blogging conference!
#3 | Merry BGP Christmas
Creating a video at Christmas time sharing favourite memories of other ladies about their family will always be one of the best ideas I’ve come up with for BGP (in my opinion!). It was a taste of what the impact of sharing the stories of others could be. This time of year can be tough for anyone, so to have a video sharing some of our “best times” and hosting an event to celebrate the same is a lot of fun for me and I hope it is for you too.
#4 | My First Photo Shoot
This brand has certainly given me a lot of “firsts” including going on my first solo photoshoot that wasn’t taken on a friend’s camera phone. Technically I was surrounded by friends with my photographer being Blakeni Walls of B.Delyn Photography and Eulannae Douglas as my makeup artist, but they can both tell you that I was not the most comfortable in front of the camera. It was hot out and I don’t exactly know how to “act natural” but we got the shot! And I’ve gotten better at the process right ladies??
#5 | Hello MilanMilan!
Big Girl Panties has really made me brave and I’ll never forget the day I walked down to the coffee shop, MilanMilan to pitch using their space as my backdrop for my next video. Who did I think I was?! Truthfully, I’ve built up this thought process that the worst thing they can say is no, and right now that’s already true because I haven’t asked. I waltzed right in there, started to plead my case, and just my luck, the Managing Director happened to be available at that moment to chat with me! She loved what I was doing and asked me to email her some more information. What a productive lunch break that was! 🙂
#6 | Girl Chats
I’m lumping this one together because it’s so tough to choose which one has been my absolute fav. Getting together with other women is so much fun for me. Feeling comfortable enough to share my voice and hearing other ladies do the same is so therapeutic! So a huge THANK YOU to the ladies that participated in the video campaigns for BGP Christmas, my round table Health Chat and Dear BGP Sister, and to the ladies that have ever joined me in the Big Girl Panties Chat Room! You ladies are amazing! And as I reflect on each of those videos, and virtual meet-ups, I’m like yeah I need to do each of those again ASAP lol. Good times!
#7 | Welcome to Big Girl Panties Podcast
The latest entry into my BGP universe is the sweet arrival of the podcast! 2020 has been pretty crazy. I’ll leave it at that and you can read more of my thoughts about that here. But one great thing that this year has brought is Big Girl Panties Podcast. I delayed this project for about a year with other personal “life stuff” taking priority, but I’m so happy that it’s finally here. I’ve released 5 episodes now and I’m so proud with how every one of them has turned out. I’m learning more about myself, creating relationships with new people, and hopefully positively impacting the lives of anyone who tunes in. Here’s to more good times ahead in the homemade recording studio in my closet!
Okay! So there’s my Top 7 memories for Big Girl Panties thus far. And let me say that this exercise was a lot easier in theory than it was in reality. I have way more memories to mention!
Before I go, here are a couple honourable mentions just because it’s impossible for me to just choose 7:
Hon. Mention #1
That time that I messed up my website while trying to “fix” something so I took the whole thing offline for a year. The site that you’re (hopefully) viewing now is more me for now. I’m rebuilding it slowly but everything you read is authentic. And that’s the most important factor in all of this for me.
Hon. Mention #2
My Ignite Bermuda family! My biggest pitching experience to date has been applying for the Ignite Bermuda entrepreneurship accelerator program. I spent 6 months in the program learning new tools and creating relationships with my cohort and partners that are there to support the entrepreneurs. It’s an experience that has helped me and will continue to help me to build BGP into a brand that I know it can become.
Okay! So I think that’s it…for now. Again there’s plenty more memories and “fav moments” that I could share but I think that’s part of it all. The whole experience is my fav. I’m so thankful to have Big Girl Panties and now I couldn’t imagine life without it because it’s an extension of who I am. I’m so grateful for all of the lessons, laughs and relationships cultivated as a result of this thing that I believe so much in. I know that this is just the beginning, and there’s so much more that can be (and will be) done during this marathon, but I just want to say THANK YOU for joining me and supporting me during this journey!
I hope that something along the way has positively impacted your life because I know that it is has without a doubt changed mine for the better! Cheers to another year and I can’t wait to see what we do next!
Happy 2nd Birthday BGP!